Diary of a Word Nerd

Friday Inspiration: #KidsNeedBooks

Posted on July 12, 2019 by Julia Tomiak / 0 Comment

With all the distressing news floating around these days – the crisis at the border, the precarious state of our environment, the nasty political rhetoric we see every day – I’m craving something positive.

And guess what? I found it! And it’s bookish!

One of my favorite quotes is:

It is better to light a single candle than to curse the darkness.
William L. Watkinson

Authors like Jarrett Lerner (The Enginerds) and Ann Braden (The Benefits of Being an Octopus) are doing just that. They have been busy lighting candles for kids by putting books in their hands. It started with Braden, who was moved by the frustrated tweets of teachers and librarians worried about students who wouldn’t have anything to read over the summer. They were concerned about something educators call “summer slide” – a drop in reading skills caused by limited access to books when school is out.

Braden, a former teacher, wanted to do something to stop summer slide, so she combed through her bookshelves and gathered a stack of books to donate to teachers. She used tweets with the hashtag #KidsNeedBooks to find interested teachers and bring awareness to the problem.

Lerner saw Braden’s tweets and searched through his own collection of books to find titles to give away. On his author website, Lerner explains, “All the books were ones that I had read and enjoyed, even loved, and that I had purchased with the intent of having them on my shelves forever. But as soon as I considered the fact that there were a tremendous number of young readers out there who, for one reason or another, were facing the prospect of being book-less all summer long, it wasn’t very hard to part with even the most beloved of these books.”

Other authors have joined in, and thanks to the #KidsNeedBooks movement, over 500 books have been put into the hands of kids who otherwise wouldn’t have read all summer.

Do I really need to keep all of these books? No, I do not. And we’ve got two more bookshelves just as full!

Wow. I love that this is so simple, and so accessible for Word Nerds like us. I’ve got tons of books sitting around the house that my kids have enjoyed but will probably not read again. I used to think I would save all of them for my grandchildren, but Lerner is right – there are kids who need those books now. Currently, Runaway Ralph is just collecting dust in my house. He could be in the hands of a child who would love to not only to read a book, but to actually own it.

Sure, there are beloved titles I will keep, but I could easily donate the others. It would be like lighting a bunch of candles.

Lerner says that he collects books throughout the year – at library sales, industry conferences, etc – to give away to teachers at the end of school. He suggests that people who want to join the #KidsNeedBooks movement can donate their unneeded books to Little Free Libraries or schools and libraries that serve needy children. My town has a Little Free Library and also many children who probably don’t have books at home. I’m late for this summer, but I can start preparing for the end of next school year. And I know a teacher and a librarian who will help me get those books into the hands of kids who need them.

It’s time to clean out! I hope this good news will make your weekend a little brighter, and that you will be inspired to light a candle yourself.

For more information on #KidsNeedBooks, visit Jarrett Lerner’s website or Ann Braden’s website.

Have you heard of the #KidsNeedBooks movement? Would you be willing to donate books?

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Awesome Young Adult Books/Book reviews/How to encourage reading/Recommended kid lit

Summer Reading Suggestions

Posted on July 5, 2019 by Julia Tomiak / 4 Comments

A few days ago, Daughter announced that she was going with her friends to “hang out in a hammock and read”. It sounded lovely. During summer, one of my favorite things to do is hide out on my sun porch in the late evening, when the light is golden and the frogs are congregating and croaking in the pond down the hill, and read.

The view from my sun porch. See the pond behind the play set?

I hope summer is giving you more time and spaces to enjoy books. (Where is your favorite place to read this time of year?) If you need suggestions for what to read, I’ve got some great ideas to share.

Kid Lit

Audio books are helping me get ahead on my Goodreads annual goal, and I just finished two lovely middle grade novels that are perfect for a family road trip.

The Miscalculations of Lightning Girl by Stacy McAnulty tells the story of 12 year old Lucy. When she was young, she was struck by lightening, and the zap gave her super math skills, but also some OCD quirks, like the need to sit down/ stand up three times before taking her seat in class. Lucy has been home schooled for years, and she’s smart enough to go to college, but her grandma thinks she needs to spend a year in public school as part of her education.

With great trepidation, Lucy embarks on her first year of middle school. She endures teasing and taunting, and more than one humiliation, but along the way she learns the value of friendship and self-acceptance. Although Lucy has unusual talent, any kid (or adult) can relate to her story. A great read!

The Benefits of Being an Octopus by Ann Braden thoughtfully tackles the challenges of living in poverty. Seventh grader Zoey rarely finishes her homework – not because she doesn’t care, but because she is too busy babysitting her younger siblings while her mom is at work. Zoey’s mom barely makes enough money to pay the electric bill, and because of her desperate situation, she puts up with an unhealthy relationship to keep her family in decent housing.

Zoey faces difficult decisions, including confronting her mom about her emotionally abusive boyfriend. Octopus has great insight into the plight of marginalized women and children, and it’s a great read for encouraging discussion and compassion.

Young Adult

On the surface, Save the Date by Morgan Matson looks like a lighthearted story of a large family pulled together for a wedding weekend. There’s a mad game of Capture the Flag, cake destroying pets, and an unfortunate suit swap. However, Save the Date addresses some of the hard things about stepping into adulthood, like reevaluating our perceptions of family and accepting change. It was a little longer than it needed to be, but I enjoyed the read, especially as I am grappling with change as my own kids transition into adulthood.

I picked up Rayne and Delilah’s Midnite Matinee by Jeff Zentner because I wanted to study the market I write in – contemporary realistic fiction. I didn’t expect to like this novel about two girls who host a public access TV show about horror movies, but I have found myself totally pulled in. Why? Because Zentner has mastered a key writing skill: MAKE US CARE.

Delia (aka Delilah) is searching to find and confront the father who abandoned her. And Josie (aka Rayne) is trying to figure out what she wants to do with her future- should she leave her best friend and new boyfriend to pursue a TV career at UT Knoxville, or should she stay close to home and the people she loves. A great novel with witty, punchy dialogue and some beautiful descriptions about falling in love, dealing with loss, and choosing your way. Here’s an example:

I wonder a lot if I’ve made a mistake by letting myself need Josie so much. Life would be so much simpler if we didn’t allow ourselves to need anybody. We wouldn’t go through this world so easy to wound, our hearts beneath some paper thin layer of skin.
Delia, on her best friend Josie

Adult

Girl, Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis is an easy read about becoming the best woman you can be. The writing isn’t profound, but the messages are good. I particularly liked Hollis’s chapters on pursuing your dreams (no one else cares about your dreams as much as you do, so you’d better go after them) and being kind to yourself and other people. Hollis is a Christian, and her faith illustrates her perceptions and decisions, but it isn’t overbearing. Overall, she promotes an attitude of acceptance and compassion. Great pool side read.

Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng is an interesting study of character and the assumptions of right and wrong. Her characters have complicated family relationships and secrets they try to hide. If you like a good character driven novel, with thoughtful insights about human nature, Fires is for you.

“To a parent, your child wasn’t just a person: your child was a place, a kind of Narnia, a vast eternal place where the present you were living and the past you remembered and the future you longed for all at the same time. You could see it every time you looked at her: layered in her face was the baby she’d been and the child she’d become and the adult she would grow up to be, and you saw them all simultaneously, like a 3-D image. It made your head spin.
Celeste Ng, Little Fires Everywhere

What have you been reading this summer? Please share more great “hammock books”!

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Who I Am

Three Places to Visit in Arizona

Posted on June 14, 2019 by Julia Tomiak / 8 Comments

In early April, daughter won a trip to Intel’s International Science and Engineering Fair (ISEF) in Phoenix. As soon as I heard she was going, I thought, “I want to go too!” Husband suggested we make it a family trip.

So, in a matter of hours, with the help of good friends, we planned a five day trip to Arizona. Phoenix is four hours away from The Grand Canyon, and we HAD to visit that, so our time in AZ involved many hours on highways. It was exhausting, but I’m glad we did it. Here are some highlights for anyone planning on spending time in Arizona.

Sedona

Our first day, we landed in Phoenix, grabbed a rental car, and headed two hours north to Sedona. Husband found an awesome resort called Los Abrigados that had suite style accommodations at a reasonable price, beautiful grounds (despite some construction), and very helpful staff.

The scenery in Sedona is gorgeous. Robust rock formations, breathtaking in size and color, surround the little town. Hiking trails abound. Our second day in Sedona, we got up early to beat the crowds and hiked the Devil’s Bridge Trail. It was a fairly easy four mile trek that brought us to the largest natural sandstone arch in the Sedona area of the Coconino National Forest.

My boys marched right over the arch, ready to pose for the kind hikers who had our phones and cameras. Unfortunately, I have a leg numbing fear of heights. “It’s wider than it looks,” they said. “No big deal.” So I ventured out and was fine until I got to the middle of the arch, felt the steady wind that stirs in places of great height, and glanced down at the rocks and trees below me.

It’s never good to look down.

I froze. My boys came back to me. I smiled for the camera and cleared off that arch as fast as my shaking legs allowed.

Sedona is a cozy tourist town with a friendly vibe. After our hike, we grabbed some treats from Sedonuts. (And we still haven’t stopped making jokes about that name.) We enjoyed a great dinner at the Secret Garden Cafe, which offered vegan options and had a no straw policy. Daughter would have loved it, but daughter was in Phoenix doing her super science thing with 1800 other super scientists. I sent her a pic.

Things close down early in Sedona, since it is a Dark Sky Community. There’s also a new age element, with crystal shops scattered throughout the town and multiple suggestions to visit a vortex. I never could get a straight answer on what a vortex is – a place with spiritual energy, I guess. Even the putt putt course at our resort encouraged relaxation.

There were many hikes we wanted to take but didn’t have time. I think we will go back.

The Grand Canyon

It was a four hour round trip journey from Sedona to The Grand Canyon, but it was worth it. We got to the south rim (the one closest to Phoenix) early (read: 8 am) to beat the crowds. We booked a guided tour with Bright Angel Bike Tours for $65 each and started our day riding along the rim of the canyon, getting fascinating information from our guides about how the canyon formed and the plants and animals that live around it. The bikes were comfy and easy to use.

After our tour, we turned in the bikes and hiked down the Bright Angel Trail, one of the easiest and busiest trails at the canyon. Our tour guides told us only 5% of people who visit The Grand Canyon travel below the rim. So sad! The views only get better as you descend. We ventured about a mile down, with 900 feet of elevation change, and after pausing for the obligatory picture, child number three insisted we had to march back out “double time”. We let him go ahead.

A super early start, sunblock and water highly recommended!

Phoenix

The city is clean and well signed, and the convention center, where ISEF was held, was gorgeous. We stayed at an Embassy Suites in Scotsdale to avoid the pricier hotels (and parking fees) in the city, but Phoenix traffic is dense, and if I had a redo, I would pick a hotel closer to downtown and suck up the price. After all of the other driving we did, commuting 20 minutes every time we went into the city was exhausting.

After taking in the spectacle of 1800 science fair projects from 80 countries around the world, we ventured to South Mountain Park and Preserve, a 16,000 acre municipal park. We drove up to Dobbins Lookout, the highest point in the park, for a fantastic view of Phoenix and the surrounding area.

The view of Phoenix from Dobbin’s Lookout

Coming from the mountains of Southwest Virginia, we thought it was crazy how far we could see. AZ has mountains popping up, but overall it is SUPER FLAT, and you can see for miles. And, I’m not gonna lie, it freaked me out a little to know, and to see so clearly from Dobbins Lookout, that we were surrounded by barren desert on ALL SIDES. The Arizona landscape is fascinating, sometimes brown and scrubby, sometimes rugged and red, sometimes dotted with pines. I’m glad we got to see it, but I was also relieved to get back to the green of Virginia.

Have you ever visited Arizona? Do you have any travel tips you’d like to add?

Thanks for “traveling” with me!

How to encourage reading/Improving vocabulary/Who I Am

What Is a Dark Sky Community?

Posted on June 7, 2019 by Julia Tomiak / 1 Comment

Apparently, some towns in this great world of ours take light pollution very seriously. I always thought light pollution in cities and suburbs just made it hard to see constellations. However, turns out light pollution causes a lot of problems.

Beautiful rock formations like this are all over Sedona!

I became aware of the hazards of excessive night time lighting when we recently traveled to Arizona. We spent a few nights in the gorgeous town of Sedona, about two hours north of Phoenix. When I asked the concierge at my hotel to recommend a restaurant for dinner, she warned me that most places in Sedona close by 9pm.

Hello? That seems pretty early to shut down, especially in a tourist town. Turns out, Sedona is a “Dark Sky Community”.

According to the International Dark-Sky Association, Dark Sky Communities strive to decrease the negative effects of light pollution by creating and enforcing policies that promote education about light pollution and more responsible use of outdoor lighting.

“Many species (including humans) need darkness to survive and thrive.”
American Medical Association Council on Science and Public Health (2012)

Don’t think light pollution is a problem? Consider this:

wasted energy: excessive lighting at night results in wasted energy- at least 30% of all US outdoor lighting is wasted and results in 21 million tons of carbon dioxide needlessly released into our atmosphere
disrupted ecosystems: light pollution at night disrupts the nocturnal activity and breeding rituals of many species; artificial light disrupts the clues that many birds use for migration; sea turtles hatching on beaches are drawn away from the ocean by artificial light
human health: artificial light at night disturbs our biological clocks and our sleep patterns and causes increased risks for obesity, depression, sleep disorders, diabetes, breast cancer and more; most outdoor lights and computer screens use blue light, which is more energy efficient but worse for human health

One main reason we use so many lights at night is to prevent crime. However, multiple studies show little evidence that increased light causes a decrease in crime.

Luckily, I live on a farm far enough away from the glaring lights of the Walmart parking lot that I can see the Milky Way from my driveway. However, my small town is definitely not a Dark Sky Community. Perhaps it should be. To learn more about the International Dark Sky Places conservation program, visit DarkSky.org/our-work.

Have you ever heard of a “Dark Sky Community”? What do you think about the issue of light pollution?

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Who I Am

Embrace the Change

Posted on May 24, 2019 by Julia Tomiak / 7 Comments

My oldest child has just completed his first year of college, and what a fabulous experience he had. He challenged himself academically, physically, and socially. He struck a successful balance between study and play. He found wonderful friends, including his roommate. And he and I established a rhythm for communication that gave him enough space, yet allowed me to feel connected.

When people ask him about college, he says, “College is great! Ten out of ten recommend.”

The goal of parenting is to launch, and my son has happily launched.

So why do I still get sad?

I’ve been prepping my son for college for the past 15 years, but the transition hit me harder than I expected. I approached moving day with a brave face, lugging linens and clothes up to the dorm room and helping just a little with organizing. When it came time to go, I said a quick goodbye and cleared out before the water works began in earnest. I was proud of myself.

But two days later, middle son, who wanted to claim some much deserved space, asked for help cleaning out oldest son’s room. I agreed, unaware of the emotional hurricane that was about to hit. With each photo I unpinned from the bulletin board, the realization that things would never be the same sank in deeper and harder. Soon, I was a mess of blinding tears and high pitched sobs. Middle son stood perplexed beside me, holding a dust cloth and asking, “Mom, are you okay?”

That was my low point.

Since then, I’ve adjusted. Somewhat. I can leave after a visit without shedding tears, but sometimes, sadness unexpectedly pops up, like when one of his siblings says something that reminds me so much of him that my throat closes and I have to blink away the heat rising in my eyes. My most recent relapse occurred when I realized he wouldn’t be home for his birthday for the first time ever. I needed a hug from a dear friend to recover.

A few weeks ago, I found a name for the emotions I’ve been grappling with for the past nine months: grief. No one has died, but a season of my life is gone. And oldest son is just the first domino to fall. Soon, I will only have two children at home. Then none. Over the next few years, the daily pattern of my life will change dramatically. This is a sobering and sometimes overwhelming thought.

But, naming my experience – grief – empowers me to deal with it more effectively. I must be kind and patient with myself during the grieving process, but I must not wallow. Change is hard for me, but it’s not necessarily bad.

Instead of clutching onto the past, I can open my heart to the possibilities that lie ahead for my children and me, and honestly, opening feels better than clutching. I will see new places as my children’s worlds expand. I will pursue some of the interests I’ve limited or put on hold for the past two decades. And, as counter intuitive as it sounds, by giving my children space to grow, I believe I will eventually find myself closer to them. Maybe not physically, but in other ways.

Honestly, opening feels better than clutching

Speaking of staying close, I’ve decided to embrace the social media /communication platform my kids like the most. Currently, that’s Snap Chat. I don’t exactly understand why everything has to come with an often goofy and crooked photo, but when I “snap” them, they respond quickly, and I get a glimpse of their world (often a classroom ceiling) or a precious face. A friend calls it “proof of life”.

As a mother, I often feel multiple emotions at the same time- pride, happiness, worry, grief- that’s just for one child. No wonder it’s so exhausting! But as challenging as this gig is, I know it’s making me a better person, and I know great things are in store, if I just open up and embrace the change.

For all you moms out there getting ready to launch a child, this is for you. Open your heart and embrace the change. And let me know if you need a hug. Thank you to Dana of Kiss My List for introducing me to the concept of “embrace”. 🙂

How do you deal with big changes?

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Book reviews

Great Book Quotes: Little Fires Everywhere

Posted on May 17, 2019 by Julia Tomiak / 1 Comment

I recently finished listening to Little Fires Everywhere, by Celeste Ng. (I’m taking advantage of my Audible membership and getting way more “reading” done via audiobooks.) A full review will come soon, but since May in general, and this week in particular, is CRAZY, for now I will share one of my favorite passages from the book.

Little Fires Everywhere book — Have you read this? A great book.

Little Fires Everywhere explores, among other things, how people decide what is “right” and “wrong”. Ng does a great job of presenting sympathetic characters who stand on opposite sides of an issue, leaving the reader to decide who is right or wrong, if anyone is.

Near the end of the book, in chapter 16, one of the characters thinks:

For her, it was simple… one had followed the rules, and one had not. But the problem with rules, he reflected, was that they implied a right way and a wrong way to do things, when in fact most of the time, there were simply ways. None of them quite wrong or quite right, and nothing to tell you for sure which side of the line you stood on.
Celeste Ng, Little Fires Everywhere

As someone who has always liked “rules”, this passage hit me hard. In a good way. As I’m getting older, I’m realizing that I need to be more flexible in how I decide “right” and “wrong”. And that sometimes, rules serve a purpose, but sometimes they cause problems.

Where do you stand on rules?

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!