It’s December 21, 2022. I’m recovering from COVID and am finally able to leave isolation in my bedroom today. But now child #4 is sick. And child #1, who doesn’t live at home, is sick and says he might wait until after Christmas to visit. Disappointed, he said he was preparing for “Scuffed Christmas 2.0”.
Why 2.0? Last year, Christmas 2021, our oldest son suspected he had COVID, and therefore he spent the holiday isolating, and we opened presents socially distanced using Face Time. But really, this year should be Scuffed Christmas 3.0, because Christmas 2020 was no dream holiday. That year, my daughter and I spent Christmas Eve and much of Christmas day away from home, caring for my father who had just been released from a week long stay in the hospital. Oh, and during that stay, he was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer.
For those of you older than 25, the “kids” use scuffed as an adjective that means “of poor standards or low quality” or to refer to something broken or not working as intended. (Thanks, Urban Dictionary.) Yep, that definitely could be our Christmas 2022.
Which is too bad, because everything is perfect at Christmas, right? I mean, the lyrics of “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” tell us every year to “Let our hearts be light” because “from now on our troubles will be out of sight.” I strongly dislike that song. Because it’s a lie. Troubles are a part of this life. I experienced many a less than perfect Christmas growing up. Like, when my parents fought, and the tension hung so thick at the dinner table that I could hardly swallow my food. When my mom cried over frustration of being stuck in her wheelchair. Then there was the Christmas we had to put her in a nursing home.
As the Man in Black tells Princess Buttercup, “Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.”* “Have yourself a merry little Christmas” is selling us an unrealistic picture of the holiday, pretending that troubles don’t shadow us just because it’s December. But many of us are facing loss and grief and pain, no matter the season. I have several friends caring for aging parents and facing difficult decisions. Several who are grieving loved ones. My husband’s aunt just got diagnosed with cancer and started chemo the first week of December. And think of the poor people in Ukraine.
I’m not a Scrooge. I am just pointing out from the midst of tinsel and twinkling lights that Christmas can be hard as well as merry. That people are struggling and sometimes the notion of a perfect Christmas makes it worse.
But we can and should find comfort in Christmas, even if it is scuffed. We should find our joy not in gifts or chocolate or decorations, but in the reason we celebrate in the first place. Good will conquer evil. Love is meant for all. And salvation comes to us in simple, humble ways, like a naked baby in a barn. We can face our troubles with hope, because we are eternally cherished. And in turn, we can cherish and support each other.
For our family this year, Christmas might not look like it has in the past, or it might not be perfect, but we will still find time to enjoy each other and share love with each other. To find moments of joy. As I told my oldest son, Christmas is a season. We can celebrate on any day, not just December 25.
Wishing you the very best this holiday season, even if it is “scuffed.” Especially if it is!
*If you don’t recognize this quote from The Princess Bride, then go watch it now! That will make you smile! 🙂
Find joy!
You are right; Christmas rarely lives up to the hype. It appears that “life” has little regard for the holidays!
But the reason for this is that most people’s idea of Christmas involves the blessings of this life, and such blessings are very fragile, indeed! Even the One whose birth is celebrated on Christmas had a very tough life, being called, “the Man of Sorrows and acquainted with grief.” For many of us, our childhood Christmases were times of special “blessing” as we woke up to a mound of gifts. We carry that feeling into our adulthood and must come to terms with the fact that the goodness of our Christmas celebrations in childhood was the work of our parents coupled with youthful naivete, not the natural consequences of a day on the calendar.
But the blessedness of Christmas is not present reality, but hope. It was the realization of something promised thousands of years previously, but it points us to another life. As the Lord said, “I have come that they might have life and have it to the full.” It is obvious that He was not speaking of our present life, for we already have that life. He came to give another life, a life with nothing lacking. This life is not fully experienced here, that is why it is called a matter of faith. We look for a life yet to come and realize that nothing in this world can satisfy us.
I have written several hymns for our church. Here is one I wrote concerning the Lord’s incarnation. It is based on a passage from Isaiah 9. We use the tune “Hyfrydol” when we sing it.
Unto us a Son is giv’n,
Unto us a Child is born;
That our sins might be forgiven,
He, our God appears this morn,
Son of David, Son of Mary,
Son of God in human flesh!
Myst’ry of the incarnation,
Lies asleep in swaddling dress.
On His shoulders lies the Government,
Of the House of Jesse’s stem,
He shall build it up with judgment,
All shall be upheld by Him.
Of its increase, of its increase,
Never shall there be an end!
For the zeal of God Almighty,
Shall His every work attend.
By what names shall all His people,
Call on Him before His throne?
Though their cries may be so feeble,
Yet the One they call is strong!
Call His name “The Wondrous Couns’ler,”
“Mighty God,” “The Prince of Peace;”
He “The Everlasting Father,”
Let His praises never cease!
As “scuffed” as our Christmas celebrations may be, the appearing of our God in human form has guaranteed a good outcome for His people. No matter how disastrous our Christmases may be, the One whose birth we celebrate has never failed at anything, and, even if we do not get what we hoped for on Christmas, all His people are “blessed with all spiritual blessings in the heavenly places in Him.”
Sorry you got Covid – that is a bummer.
Concerning “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas,” the following Wikipedia article may interest you. As originally written, it was a bittersweet song.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Have_Yourself_a_Merry_Little_Christmas
Wow! Thank you! These are good thoughts to keep in mind. Thank you for the link to the song… I will check it out.
You are amazing. I’m sorry Alex won’t be with you. I’m sure he’s as disappointed as you are. And Bernie told me about her sister. Unhappiness is everywhere, but so is happiness. I get disgusted with my situation, but, truthfully, the stroke has given me more time to get closer to God, and that’s a wonderful thing. Merry Christmas, Sweetie. And a wonderful New Year wish to you all. I truly
Love you all. Bernie has always been a light in my life and I know Bill is a light in Aaron’s life. Here’s to Christmas- scuffed as it May be!
Thank you, Mrs P- that really makes me smile. I know you have been frustrated recovering from your stroke, but I’m so glad you have grown stronger in your faith. You are definitely a light too! Merry Christmas!