Improving vocabulary

Getting to the heart of Thanksgiving: Companion

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Recently, my Mental Floss Word A Day Calendar featured the familiar word companion, which means a friend, an associate, or one that accompanies another. What I didn’t realize was how much companion has to do with food! As we prepare to gather with friends and family on November 27th to celebrate Thanksgiving, I think companion is a word we all should contemplate.

Etymology

Companion comes from the Latin com-, meaning with, and –panis, meaning bread or food. So, it literally means “one whom you break bread with.” Other Latin based languages have similar words. The French word copain means friend, and the Italian word compagno means mate. I never realized this word for a friend was tied to eating, and yet, the meaning makes a lot of sense, especially when we consider the importance of shared meals in our culture.

Cultural relevance

Many of the world’s main religious traditions have ritual meals that symbolize unity and faith. In Christian churches, people gather regularly to consume bread and wine as the Eucharist or Communion, which is a reenactment of The Last Supper, or the last time Jesus shared a meal with his disciples. In the Jewish faith, people gather to eat the Passover Seder, a commemoration of the liberation of the Israelites from slavery in Egypt. Each day during Ramadan, Muslims break their dawn to dusk fast with the Iftar meal, which usually starts with the consumption of dates, a fruit favored by the prophet Muhammad. 

Outside of religion, Americans are drawn to communal meals as a form of celebration and unification. We gather to share meals on special occasions, like wedding receptions, birthdays, and holidays. The most notable shared meal is Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving-like gatherings started in America in the 1600’s as a way to celebrate the harvest. They persisted until 1789 when President George Washington declared a day of “public Thanksgiving and prayer” on Thursday, November 26. Many presidents followed his lead, proclaiming days to be set aside for thanksgiving. In 1863, President Abraham Lincoln declared that Thanksgiving Day would be observed annually on the fourth Thursday of November. The dates shifted a bit under different presidents after that, but in 1941, a Joint Resolution of Congress officially declared the fourth Thursday of November to be Thanksgiving Day, and that’s how we have celebrated it for the past century. All of this hasn’t happened by chance. Science shows us that people are social creatures, and we crave the connection of eating together.

More and more experts agree that social engagement is critical for happiness and well-being. According to the World Happiness Report of 2025, sharing meals with others is the most important predictor of increased positive mood. According to the data, eating a meal with someone had a more beneficial effect on well-being than income or employment. Sharing a meal brings us in close proximity to others as we meet a basic physical need together. And social scientists have been telling us for decades that families that eat dinner together develop stronger bonds than families that do not. Food is a universal language, and we can all appreciate its importance, no matter where we live or what religion we do or do not practice.

However, the same World Happiness Report noted a concerning trend. More people eat alone now than in previous years. In 2023, 25% of people surveyed ate all of their meals alone. And more young people are eating meals by themselves. It was a tendency that started before the COVID 19 pandemic and has continued to increase in the years after it.

Since we know how important sharing a meal can be for personal well-being, we should look for more opportunities to invite others to eat with us and be true companions. Sharing a meal, on Thanksgiving or any other day, offers the opportunity for connection and discussion, a chance to embrace our shared traditions and understand our differences. Many powers in the world today are trying to pull us apart. We can counteract that with the simple act of enjoying food in the company of others.

How will you celebrate companionship this Thanksgiving?

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Improving vocabulary

What you need to know about the word “Patriot”

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The word “Patriot” has been used in America since the beginning of our nation. We often think of “patriots” as people who love their country and take pride in citizenship. Look to Mel Gibson’s character in the movie The Patriot or Marvel’s Captain America for patriots who use their bravery and strength to protect their country. Yet, throughout history, patriot has also taken on negative tones. Consider the anti-government Patriot Movement of the 1980’s and 90’s to see how patriotism can go awry. Today, we who pay attention to the news notice that patriot remains a word with the power to unify or divide.

Etymology of patriot

Patriot comes from the Greek words patriotes, “fellow countryman,” patrios “of one’s fathers,” and patris “fatherland.” It entered English use in the 16th century via the French word patriote, meaning “countryman” or “compatriot.” Shortly thereafter, in the 1600s, political unrest characterized Western Europe as Protestants and Catholics battled for power. Often, the adjective “good” was used before patriot to clarify when someone was on the correct side of a political divide. Whether or not you were a “good patriot” depended on which side you were on and who was judging your worthiness.

History of use

Later, in the 17th century, patriot became a term of ridicule or abuse. It took on the derogatory sense of someone who claims to support his country but actually does not. A patriot was someone who was disloyal, who had partisan desires to upset the established government.

Therefore, it should be no surprise that American colonists and writers of the 18th century welcomed the term patriot to describe the people fighting against the tyranny of the British monarchy. Note, the British rarely referred to the colonists as patriots. Instead, they called them rebels or “the rabble.” After the American Revolution, thanks to the success of the war, patriot returned to its original meaning, with a positive connotation, of a fellow countryman.

Things turned divisive again in the 1850s, when some Americans resented the influx of immigrants into the United States. Patriot appeared in nationalistic hate speech and in the rhetoric of the Know Nothing Party. This political organization and its supporters saw external influences and immigrants as a threat to American values. In that era, a patriot named someone who put America first before all other concerns. This promoted an “us versus them” mentality.

Some semblance of this meaning of patriot persisted into the 20th century. The Patriot Movement of the 1980s and 90s promoted the idea that any person or organization who didn’t embrace America First values was considered a threat. And that threat could include the United States Government. The Patriot Movement spawned a rise in state militias and anti-government rhetoric. Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols supported The Patriot Movement. They were both convicted of involvement in the Oklahoma City Bombing of 1995, the deadliest act of terrorism in American history. And as recently as 2021, the men and women who stormed and vandalized the Capitol in Washington, DC on January 6th, were called patriots by President Donald Trump.

Modern use

In its 2005 revisions, the Oxford English Dictionary included one entry for the definition of patriot that says, “an opponent of presumed intervention by the federal government in affairs of individuals, especially with respect to gun and tax laws. Frequently in the names of libertarian political and militia groups.” When asked about this definition, the editors of the OED said they added the entry based on current use.

In September 2025, on the podcast “The Opinions” from The New York Times, director Ken Burns discussed his upcoming documentary The American Revolution. Among other things, the film grapples with the notion of what a patriot is. According to Burns, a patriot is a “lover of constitutional liberty.” Burns said in the interview that he wants “patriot” to be a word all Americans can find a place in. After learning about the controversial history behind this term, I think that’s a lofty aspiration. But I share the hope that Americans can return to using the word patriot as a positive force for hope and unification.

What are your thoughts on the word patriot? Tell me in the comments.

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Book reviews

The Heaven and Earth Grocery Store: A great read for this moment in America

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I was a huge fan of James McBride’s The Color of Water, which celebrates the strength of his white mother, who told her 12 children that “God is the color of water.” So, when I spotted McBride’s most recent release, The Heaven and Earth Grocery Store, I got it for my son. Then convinced my book club to read it. Then stole it from my son. I’ll give it back, I promise.

Premise

The Heaven and Earth Grocery Store opens with a mystery – a skeleton at the bottom of an old well up on Chicken Hill. To figure out how it got there, readers must learn the story of the people who lived on Chicken Hill in the 1920’s. And what a colorful cast of characters they are. Jews, Blacks, Italians, and other immigrants scraping out an existence on the Hill, a few streets away but worlds apart from the wealthier, whiter areas of Pottstown, PA.  Difficulties and disabilities plague the residents of The Hill, and yet, when a suspicious incident in a local grocery store lands two members of the community in the hospital, many step up to help.

What I liked

I finished reading The Heaven and Earth Grocery Store while visiting my daughter in Brooklyn. During our time in NYC, I actually walked through the Red Hook neighborhood where McBride grew up. Traveling the streets of Brooklyn and experiencing the diversity of language, food, and fashion offered the perfect complement to McBride’s book, which celebrates diversity. (I could not get over the distinctive hats I saw several Jewish men wearing in Brooklyn. The fur hats, called shreimels, are round and about six inches tall and a foot in diameter. They are meant to resemble a crown. Look them up!)  

McBride’s writing is gorgeous. He expertly uses language to cultivate settings and characters that readers will not forget. In fact, McBride offers so many flawed, compelling, and curious characters, I almost forgot about the skeleton in the well! Some of his characters are dark and dangerous, but others embody beauty and generosity. His story exemplifies how small actions by people with limited power can make a huge difference. Like how two boys, one with significant physical limitations and one who cannot hear, develop their own language in the darkness of a crowded, stench filled hospital ward. Just when the plot starts feeling overwhelmingly dark, McBride shines a light on the best aspects of human nature.

Some of my favorite characters in the novel are women. McBride demonstrates their beauty and strength not just through physical attributes, but also through their compassion and determination. 

The Heaven and Earth Grocery Store explores the theme of connection amid differences, and the novel celebrates inclusivity. This theme feels particularly relevant given the present conditions in America. Some characters reflect the anti-immigrant rhetoric we hear today, and the book forces readers to give nuanced consideration to the plight of immigrants. McBride uses the words from the Statue of Liberty, “Give us your poor, your tired, your weak…” as a powerful refrain at the end of the novel to juxtapose the promise of the American Dream against this country’s current struggles with a just and sustainable immigration policy.

What I don’t like

As I mentioned, there are lots of characters. They are all well drawn and interesting, but it was hard to keep them straight. I wish I had started notes on an index card at the beginning of the novel to help me remember their backstories. There are also a lot of Jewish references which I didn’t understand.  I’ve had little exposure to Jewish culture, so that made reading at the beginning of the story feel like work sometimes. But thanks to Mr. McBride, I’ve learned a few things about Judaism.

Recommendation

If you are interested in issues of diversity, inclusivity, and understanding people from other backgrounds, The Heaven and Earth Grocery Store would be a fabulous read. Most of the members of my book club loved it, and it spurred very interesting discussion. If you pick it up, don’t neglect to read the inspiring acknowledgements from McBride at the back of the book.

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Book reviews

Why it’s important to read SOLD, one of 2024’s most challenged books

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I’ve never traveled to Nepal. Never scraped out an existence on the slopes of the Himalayas. I have never, thank God, been duped into forced labor or prostitution. But Patricia McCormick’s 2006 YA novel SOLD helped me understand what all of that might feel like. SOLD broke my heart and spurred empathy for the thousands of Nepalese girls sold into prostitution each year. It also forced me to think more deeply about the victims of human trafficking in my own country. Of young girls who suffered at the hands of men like Jeffrey Epstein and Sean “Diddy” Combs.

According to the VCU Capital News Service, human trafficking cases are increasing in my home state of Virginia. On the national level, we’ve had to grapple with reality of human trafficking as details about the Epstein and Combs cases continue to pop up in the media. In this season, people need to read stories like SOLD and learn more about the problem of human trafficking. Unfortunately, according to the American Library Association, SOLD was one of the most banned or challenged books of 2024. People can’t learn about human trafficking if organizations succeed in censoring literature about it.

Welcome to Banned Books Week, an annual event sponsored by the American Library Association and the Banned Books Week Coalition to bring awareness to the importance of keeping free access to books and literature.  Each year I choose a banned book to read and review to share the value of story and the danger of censorship. This year’s novel is SOLD.

Premise

SOLD by Patricia McCormick tells the story of Lakshmi, a 13-year-old girl who lives in the mountains of Nepal with her mother, infant brother, and stepfather. When poverty paired with her step-father’s gambling habit threatens to ruin her family, Lakshmi agrees to find work in the city to earn money.

Led by a glamorous stranger in a “yellow cloud dress” and a man Lakshmi calls “Uncle Husband,” the young girl travels far from home to the strange sights, sounds, and smells of the city. After she arrives at the ironically named “Happiness House,” Lakshmi faces starvation and cruel beatings at the hands of Mumtaz, a fat old woman who runs the place. Slowly, and with horror, Lakshmi realizes she’s powerless to leave “Happiness House” or escape the men who visit her nightly.

What I liked

SOLD was a National Book Award Finalist, and no wonder. The writing is sparse, but powerful. The chapters are quick vignettes, sometimes only a few paragraphs long, but their brevity cuts to the heart. At one point late in the story, Lakshmi observes,

“Mumtaz is a monster, I tell myself. Only a monster could do what she does to innocent girls. But I wonder. If the crying of a young girl is the same to me as the bleating of the horns in the street below, what have I become?”

While the setting and story are bleak, bright spots shine through the dark. Despite her dire circumstances, Lakshmi finds friends and connection. McCormick shows us not just the worst of human nature, but also the best. And in the end, Lakshmi triumphs.

The dark aspects of sexual slavery are described with taste and discretion. The reader clearly understands what is happening to Lakshmi, but the focus is on her response, not the deeds themselves. McCormick tackles a difficult subject delicately.

What I didn’t like

Based on the subject, SOLD was not necessarily something I wanted to settle in with before bed. But it’s short, and the understanding and empathy it generates make SOLD a worthwhile read.

Recommendation

Last May, I was shocked to realize that high school cosmetology students at our county vocational school get certified in human trafficking recognition. With research, I discovered that some secondary school divisions in Virginia offer human trafficking curriculum for all secondary students. And a 2023 law mandates that public universities and colleges in Virginia include a trauma-informed human trafficking training for all first-year students. Young adults and college students, as well as teen runaways, are particularly vulnerable to human traffickers. They need more information and discussion about the issue, not less, and a book like SOLD will only help them understand the problem. Adults also need to appreciate the gravity of the issue, and how innocent young people find themselves lured into a life of slavery. SOLD should remain in our school and public libraries for those who choose to read it.

Learn more about other Banned Books

When you hear about a book being banned, read it and decide for yourself if its message and theme are more important than potentially offensive material. For other Banned Books reviewed here on my site, visit:

Also, for the most up to date information about book banning as of October 2025, check out these articles:

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Improving vocabulary

Democracy 101: what you need to know about liberal democracy

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When I attended church as a child, and the congregation recited the Apostle’s Creed, my mother always omitted the word “catholic.” Everyone around us said, “I believe in one holy, catholic, and apostolic church,” but Mom subbed in “Christian” for “catholic.” Her issue with the Roman Catholic Church stemmed from her childhood, when her father had a kerfuffle with the church over CCD attendance requirements and confirmation. Grandpa Willoughby ended up pulling everyone out of Catholic Church, and Mom acquired a distaste for all things Catholic. (Note the big C).

What Mom didn’t realize, or didn’t care about, was that the Apostle’s Creed uses “little c” catholic, which means “comprehensive or universal,” according to Merriam-Webster.

Along similar lines, I’m concerned that these days, as we hear talk about the United States being a “liberal democracy,” people might assume, and dare I say bristle at the notion, that the liberal in this term refers to “Big L” Liberal. As in, left leaning politics. That is not necessarily the case. Let’s be civically engaged citizens and clarify what this political term means.

According to Britannica, the idea of liberal democracy came about as a reaction to historical events of the 18th Century, including the European Enlightenment and the American and French Revolutions. Philosophers and politicians sought a form of government which upheld individual rights and allowed the people to rule themselves with limited state interference. The terms liberal and democracy existed separately before the revolutionary movements of the late 1700s.

Liberalism started with the 17th century philosopher John Locke during the Enlightenment. Locke proposed that every person had the natural right to life, liberty, and property. From Locke came the idea that government should function for the benefit of the people and according to their will.

The principles of democracy have a much older history. Records of a democratic government are found as far back as sixth century Greece. A political reformer in Athens started a new type of government called demokratia, meaning “rule of the people.” Much later, in 1215, the people of England embraced democratic ideals through the signing of the Magna Carta, a document that forced British monarchs to comply with written laws. But true democracy didn’t gain a foothold until the American Revolution.

After the United States gained independence from England, the Founding Fathers combined the principles of liberalism and democracy to form a unique government framework: a liberal democracy. This type of government incorporates several key principles.

First, plurality and tolerance are valued. This means power is dispersed among diverse groups and opposing political positions are accepted. Second, a liberal democracy uses a written constitution to resolve disagreements and maintain the rule of law. Third, such a democracy establishes a separation of powers between branches of government to prevent one branch from gaining dominance. Finally, a liberal democracy protects the civil rights of all individuals and allows the people choose (read: vote on) who will serve in government.

Now that we know a little more about what a liberal democracy should look like, we can better evaluate how well its principals show up in our current climate. If you are like me, you have concerns. But rather than becoming confused or discouraged, we must seek to understand current events in light of our country’s history This will give us a better perspective on how our government works and what we should demand as citizens of a liberal democracy. We the people must stay engaged, to protect not only our own rights and interests, but also the framework and values of this experiment in democracy that our Founders envisioned 250 years ago. I hope you will join me in that effort.

If you’d like to learn more political terms, check out my posts on:

Is there another political or historical term you’d like to share or learn more about? Tell me in the comments.

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Book reviews

Dive into the secrets of Generations: what I learned from the book

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When I was in my late 20s, and my grandmother was in her 80s, she said to me, “I just don’t understand the world anymore.” Born in 1914 and “a child of the depression,” she’d seen more change than she could process. Now, as a 54-year-old watching my children communicate with each other in a language of memes and videos, I think, “Oma, I understand what you meant!” What seems basic and normal to my kids often feels strange to me. Generational differences are real!

However, I value connection, so I believe that making the effort to understand those differences will improve my relationships. That’s why I’m glad my friend Michele recommended the non-fiction book Generations by Jean M. Twenge.  Generations helped me understand why I, a Gen X woman, perceive the world differently than my in-laws, who are Silents, and my children of Gen Z. Twenge’s observations have opened the door to productive discussions and considerations that might make this year’s Thanksgiving family gathering more enjoyable. 

The premise

In Generations: The Real Differences Between Gen Z, Millennials, Gen X, Boomers, and Silents―and What They Mean for America’s Future, psychologist Jean M Twenge presents exhaustive data about the six generations currently alive in the United States. Twenge reviews basic statistics about each generation, highlights important people and historical events, and attempts to draw conclusions about why members of each generation have different beliefs and behaviors. I found her insights compelling.

What I liked

While Twenge acknowledges that one should use generalizations with caution, she bases her assumptions on research and data. Her presentation of Generation X, my generation, felt accurate and on point. I could relate to most of what she said, and it also helped me understand why my parents saw the world the way they did and why my children perceive it from a vastly changed perspective. Based on her research, Twenge argues that technological changes and the rise in individualism have had greater impact on the differences between the generations than historical events.

Twenge asserts that technology and rising individualism have affected confidence and trust within American society over the past several decades. Here is a definition of individualism vs. collectivism from the website VeryWell Mind: Collectivism stresses the importance of the community and places great value on unity, selflessness, and altruism. Individualism focuses on individual rights and concerns, independence, and personal identity.

Twenge suggests that while individualism has had some positive effects on our culture, it has worsened polarization in our country. She suggests that the rise of individualism (the idea that the self is more important than the community) contributes to misinformation and public health concerns like mask refusal and vaccine hesitancy during the pandemic of 2020. In her chapter on Generation X, she says:

Individualism is one reason why eroding trust has led to such dark places for some Americans across all generations, not just among Gen X. Individualism creates the idea that one person’s view is just as good as another’s, despite differences in expertise.

What I didn’t like 

I listened to the audio recording of Generations, which works well for me with non-fiction books. It’s like listening to a podcast, which I do often. However, Twenge frequently refers to data charts, so the phrase “See table ___ in the accompanying PDF” frequently interrupted the flow of the book. This is good for accountability, but bad for listening. Sometimes the chapters felt long or repetitive, and I thought she could have been more concise with her data and observations. Finally, I listened with a healthy dose of skepticism, as it’s never a good idea to make broad assumptions about large groups of people.

Recommendation

Reading Generations helped me understand why people in my community might view the world differently than I do. Or why my in-laws vote the way they do. I believe anything that increases empathy and understanding is a worthwhile read. If you agree, and you enjoy non-fiction, give Generations a try.

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!