Book reviews/How to encourage reading

The Correspondent: a great read to cheer your soul

Posted on by Julia Tomiak / 0 Comment

Going into the holidays, my book club chose something light and happy to read: The Correspondent by Virginia Evans. I happily turned to it after DNF-ing Butter. Upon listening to the first chapter of the audiobook, which is very well done, I breathed a sigh of relief, immediately taken in by Sybil Van Antwerp and her letters.

Premise

The Correspondent tells the story of Sybil Van Antwerp, retired lawyer, divorcee, lover of words and books. After a successful law career, Sybil lives a predictable life in her home by the water near Annapolis, MD. She doesn’t like to travel but instead sends her thoughts into the world via letter writing – to friends, family, and people she never has or will meet, including famous authors like Joan Didion and Anne Patchett. But when this master correspondent feels the effects of a vision impairment and starts getting disturbing letters from a troubled time in her past, she must confront feelings and truths she has long avoided.

What I like

I love Sybil. She is smart, funny, determined, flawed. Often, I laughed out loud at her wit. Sometimes I shook my head at her presumptions. I could relate to her love of the written word and the history it preserves. Also like Sybil, I often find it easier to express myself in letters or notes than in face-to-face conversations. Turns out we both have room to grow.

The Correspondent features many characters, but Evans does a nice job of developing and distinguishing them. The audiobook uses different voice actors for most characters, which also helped. One of my favorite supporting characters is Sybil’s best friend, who isn’t afraid to confront Sybil about her flaws. And her kind neighbor Theodore, a quiet man, yet determined in his own way.

As the chapters progress, we learn more about Sybil’s backstory, which gives meaning and depth to her present challenges. I loved how Sybil’s evolution shows how it is possible to change and embrace the world on new terms, even later in life.  As Sybil’s physical ability to see diminishes, her emotional ability to perceive expands, a very inspiring message indeed.

What I don’t like

The Correspondent is an epistolary novel, which means it’s in the form of letters. I enjoy this format. The structure quickly and efficiently conveys the voices of the different characters. I have enjoyed other epistolary novels, including Where’d You Go Bernadette, The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society, and The Last Days of Summer. (Click to see my reviews.) However, the format can feel contrived at times, with events or dialogue feeling forced into a letter. Also, since all information is given through letters, we miss some important scenes or details.

Recommendation

The Correspondent was a nominee for several Goodreads Choice Awards for 2025, including: Readers’ Favorite Fiction, Readers’ Favorite Debut Novel, Readers’ Favorite Audiobook.  My book club loved it, and so did I. Especially in the dark days of winter, when our societal issues feel overwhelming at times, The Correspondent is a lovely read, a testament to the ability of the human spirit to adapt and grow. I also highly recommend the audiobook.

Also, here’s the link to a NYT interview with debut author Virginia Evans.

Have you read an epistolary novel you’ve enjoyed? Tell us about it in the comments.

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Book reviews/How to encourage reading

What I liked about My Friends, even though it’s sad

Posted on by Julia Tomiak / 0 Comment

I’m a huge fan of Fredrik Backman, starting a few years ago with A Man Called Ove. Backman, who is from Sweden, has such an eloquent style and a talent for capturing truths about life and human nature.

Premise

My Friends is a hero’s journey with a coming of age novel tucked inside. Backman gives us two unlikely companions, middle-aged Ted and teen Louisa, who accidentally find each other because of one painting. Immediately, if not awkwardly, they connect over a love for art and the people who create it. Backman, with his gorgeous writing and lyrical style, captures the importance of friendship and connection.

What I like

The characters in My Friends are flawed, foolish, and struggling, yet they are also hilarious and endearing. More than once while listening to the audiobook, I laughed out loud. Backman captures the naivete and rawness of youth. I enjoyed spending time with these 14 year olds. Every character in this book has faced some kind of challenge or dysfunction, and that is what binds them together and makes their stories so compelling.

Ted, a very careful and anxious character, while recalling a memory for Louisa, thinks this about himself: “He is scared of a sound he didn’t even experience. That’s the worst thing about having a vivid imagination. It works in all directions.” I’ve been cursed with a vivid imagination my entire life, and I could fully relate to this statement.

Backman also has a knack for expressing emotions in new and creative ways. I have decided to use his writing for a study of how to bring fresh techniques for conveying emotion into my own writing. I loved this quote about adolescence:

Our teenage years have to simultaneously be the brightest light and the darkest depths because that’s how we learn to figure out our horizons. 

For me, a sign that a book resonated with me is how many highlights or notes I have about it. For My Friends, I had plenty. Here’s a great one about parenthood:

Being a parent is so strange; all our children’s pain belongs to us, but so does their joy.

And here’s one that seems particularly relevant to the chaos of our world today:

A violent man is a sickness for all around him. Violence is a plague that spreads through everybody it comes into contact with.

I loved the themes of resilience, forgiveness, and putting up with the flaws of others in our lives.  As someone who loves and appreciates art, I enjoyed how My Friends highlights the importance of art in making life not just easier to endure, but also much more enjoyable.

What I don’t like

While there are happy moments and endings, the overall tone of My Friends is sad. It took me a while to finish because it wasn’t a book that made me want to get back to it. Yet, one of my friends said she couldn’t put it down because she loved the story so much.

Perhaps part of my reason for having trouble was that until well into the book, one of the main characters in the story is referred to as “The Artist” – this made him feel distant. 

Recommendation

Beartown, Fredrick Backman

I like Beartown and A Man Called Ove better. But, if you like art or friendship or quirky characters, My Friends is a worthwhile read. Be ready to laugh and cry.

Have you read any of Backman’s work? What do you like best and why? Tell us about it in the comments.

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

How to encourage reading/Improving vocabulary

What you need to know about slop, 2025’s Word of the Year

Posted on by Julia Tomiak / 0 Comment

I live in a farming community. I know what slop is.

Do you?

An explanation

Merriam Webster chose “slop” as 2025’s Word of the Year based on look ups and popular use on the internet. That means it has nothing to do with the soft mud or pig slop of agriculture. Instead, the “slop” of 2025 describes “digital content of low quality that is produced usually in (high) quantity by means of AI (artificial intelligence).”

Simply put, slop is visual junk.

AI slop permeates the internet. Last fall, big tech companies like Google, Meta, and OpenAI released AI video generators to the public. Products like Veo 3 (Google), Vibes (Meta), and Sora (Open AI) make it easy for anyone to create short videos based on a prompt. Some of these products are integrated into social media apps. For example, one could use Veo 3 inside of YouTube to create YouTube shorts. Similar AI generators for still images have been around even longer. The result: slop everywhere.

If the term “slop” sounds derogatory to you, it’s meant to. Some consider it a mocking term, a criticism of AI that conveys the message that AI can’t replace human creativity.

Slop: the problems

Whether or not the images and videos are good, they flood our social media feeds and create multiple problems. The overwhelming presence of AI generated images and videos makes it even harder for us to believe what we see.  Already in our country, people don’t trust media. The arrival of AI slop only worsens the problem and deepens existing polarization.

Problem: slop confuses fact and fiction.

President Trump recently shared a photo of himself holding an American flag near a sign that says, “GREENLAND, US Territory est. 2026.” Vice President J.D. Vance and Secretary of State Marco Rubio stand behind the president, all of them wearing dark suits in a frozen, rocky landscape. President Trump also released an AI generated image of himself in the Oval Office surrounded by officials. In the image, he points to a large map of North America. Most of the land, including Canada and Greenland, is covered by the US flag. The images are fiction. As of January, 2026, the US does not encompass Canada or Greenland. These images blur the truth.

Problem: slop can contribute to damaging online behavior.

Elon Musk’s AI generator Grok recently faced scrutiny because users were asking Grok to undress images of women on the platform. And it did. AI tools make it easier to produce “deep fakes,” content that looks and sounds highly realistic but can misrepresent people or their actions. For example, boys at a middle school in Louisiana recently shared nude photos of one of their female classmates. The photos were deep fakes. AI generated videos have also circulated showing doctors endorsing treatments that they don’t actually endorse.

Problem: social media companies are not concerned with safety or quality.

The pictures we scroll past on Instagram and Facebook are small. The popular ones, or the ones the algorithm feeds us, are designed to illicit an emotional response. Tech companies don’t care if the images are good or true; they just want us to react, like, and share. Everything happens quickly, which doesn’t allow time for rational criticism or thoughtful consideration of whether or not what we share is helpful or accurate.

Tech companies make money when we generate slop and engage with content. They have no legal obligation or financial inclination to set up guidelines for quality or accuracy. We are going to have to demand that ourselves. And we have a tough road ahead.

How to fight back

The challenge is steep, but we are not helpless. We can fight the rise of slop by adopting more intentional and healthy habits in our digital lives. First, we must stop and evaluate images we encounter online. We should pause and ask ourselves a few questions before we jump into engagement with the content. What is the source of this image? How reliable is the source? Are there other versions of this image from other outlets? And if the image evokes an intense response, we should be highly suspicious.

We also need to get information from places besides social media. Quick hits of text and images from an app like Facebook or TikTok do not paint a complete picture. We need to consult multiple reputable sources to learn how accurate information is. We cannot get all of our information from one channel, influencer, or feed.

Finally, a great antidote to slop is spending time outside of the digital world. We should, to quote another term from 2025, “touch grass.” That means we need to engage with nature and interact with real people to protect a sense of balance and reality in our lives.

Slop is everywhere online. But we don’t have to roll in it. Please be thoughtful about what you consume and share.

Read more tips on how to have a healthy relationship with tech here.

How are you fighting back against slop? Have you had a bad experience with it? Share in the comments.

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Improving vocabulary

Fun words you need to know for the holidays

Posted on by Julia Tomiak / 1 Comment

I’m managing holiday stress this year with a few important tricks. First, a regular evening walk with my dog Scout. Even when it’s cold and I don’t want to go, she does. And it’s good for my physical and mental health. So, we move.

And of course, any true Word Nerd finds fun at the holidays by learning something about the words of the season! This week, I’ve got some interesting tid bits about the holiday terms yule and troll.

That’s right. Troll.

What? Troll doesn’t immediately conjure up images of holly and ivy? Instead, are you thinking about the giant Cave Troll from Harry Potter? Or the creatures who terrorized Bilbo in The Hobbit? Or perhaps the annoying people who post inflammatory comments on the internet? All of those are valid meanings for troll, but there is yet another.

The origins of troll

According to Merriam Webster, troll can be used as a verb to mean “to sing the parts of something (as in a round), to sing loudly, or to celebrate in song.” And yes, you have belted out “troll” during the singing of a Christmas Carol. Can you guess which one?

Here are the lyrics to the end of the first verse of “Deck the Halls:”

Don we now our gay apparel

Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la

Troll the ancient Yule-tide carol

Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la

FYI, “Deck the Halls” was originally a Welsh song from the 16th century. It was used for a drinking competition on New Year’s Eve. In 1862, a Scottish musician named Thomas Olifant penned English lyrics for the Welsh tune. His words celebrate the fun of decorating for Christmas and singing with joy. Hence, the use of troll.

Merriam Webster points out that the verb troll is “Probably ultimately a sound-symbolic verb whose divergent meanings are difficult to reconcile historically, suggesting multiple creations or sources.” The site suggests that the singing meaning for troll could from the Middle English word trollen “to roll, rock (the head).”

The origin of yule

While we are on the topic of yule-tide carols, let’s take a look at yule. According to Merriam-Webster, yule means “the feast of the nativity of Jesus.” And yet, the word yule comes from the Middle English yol, from Old English geōl; akin to Old Norse jōl, a pagan midwinter festival. So how did we get from pagan holidays to the birth of Jesus?

In ancient times, people in the Mediterranean and Europe celebrated feasts around the winter solstice, December 25th. Germans had a yule festival, and Romans celebrated the pagan festival of Saturnalia by feasting and giving gifts to the poor. Most of these celebrations involved heavy drinking. Church history suggests that perhaps the Christian church chose December 25 to mark the birth of Jesus to keep the faithful from indulging in these less pious activities.

However it came about, yule is now practically synonymous with Christmas. (which came from Christ’s Mass!)

And now you have something to talk about at holiday parties besides football and politics. You’re welcome.

What fun holiday words have you learned or would like to learn more about? Share in the comments.

Happy holidays!

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Improving vocabulary

Getting to the heart of Thanksgiving: Companion

Posted on by Julia Tomiak / 1 Comment

Recently, my Mental Floss Word A Day Calendar featured the familiar word companion, which means a friend, an associate, or one that accompanies another. What I didn’t realize was how much companion has to do with food! As we prepare to gather with friends and family on November 27th to celebrate Thanksgiving, I think companion is a word we all should contemplate.

Etymology

Companion comes from the Latin com-, meaning with, and –panis, meaning bread or food. So, it literally means “one whom you break bread with.” Other Latin based languages have similar words. The French word copain means friend, and the Italian word compagno means mate. I never realized this word for a friend was tied to eating, and yet, the meaning makes a lot of sense, especially when we consider the importance of shared meals in our culture.

Cultural relevance

Many of the world’s main religious traditions have ritual meals that symbolize unity and faith. In Christian churches, people gather regularly to consume bread and wine as the Eucharist or Communion, which is a reenactment of The Last Supper, or the last time Jesus shared a meal with his disciples. In the Jewish faith, people gather to eat the Passover Seder, a commemoration of the liberation of the Israelites from slavery in Egypt. Each day during Ramadan, Muslims break their dawn to dusk fast with the Iftar meal, which usually starts with the consumption of dates, a fruit favored by the prophet Muhammad. 

Outside of religion, Americans are drawn to communal meals as a form of celebration and unification. We gather to share meals on special occasions, like wedding receptions, birthdays, and holidays. The most notable shared meal is Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving-like gatherings started in America in the 1600’s as a way to celebrate the harvest. They persisted until 1789 when President George Washington declared a day of “public Thanksgiving and prayer” on Thursday, November 26. Many presidents followed his lead, proclaiming days to be set aside for thanksgiving. In 1863, President Abraham Lincoln declared that Thanksgiving Day would be observed annually on the fourth Thursday of November. The dates shifted a bit under different presidents after that, but in 1941, a Joint Resolution of Congress officially declared the fourth Thursday of November to be Thanksgiving Day, and that’s how we have celebrated it for the past century. All of this hasn’t happened by chance. Science shows us that people are social creatures, and we crave the connection of eating together.

More and more experts agree that social engagement is critical for happiness and well-being. According to the World Happiness Report of 2025, sharing meals with others is the most important predictor of increased positive mood. According to the data, eating a meal with someone had a more beneficial effect on well-being than income or employment. Sharing a meal brings us in close proximity to others as we meet a basic physical need together. And social scientists have been telling us for decades that families that eat dinner together develop stronger bonds than families that do not. Food is a universal language, and we can all appreciate its importance, no matter where we live or what religion we do or do not practice.

However, the same World Happiness Report noted a concerning trend. More people eat alone now than in previous years. In 2023, 25% of people surveyed ate all of their meals alone. And more young people are eating meals by themselves. It was a tendency that started before the COVID 19 pandemic and has continued to increase in the years after it.

Since we know how important sharing a meal can be for personal well-being, we should look for more opportunities to invite others to eat with us and be true companions. Sharing a meal, on Thanksgiving or any other day, offers the opportunity for connection and discussion, a chance to embrace our shared traditions and understand our differences. Many powers in the world today are trying to pull us apart. We can counteract that with the simple act of enjoying food in the company of others.

How will you celebrate companionship this Thanksgiving?

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Improving vocabulary

What you need to know about the word “Patriot”

Posted on by Julia Tomiak / 1 Comment

The word “Patriot” has been used in America since the beginning of our nation. We often think of “patriots” as people who love their country and take pride in citizenship. Look to Mel Gibson’s character in the movie The Patriot or Marvel’s Captain America for patriots who use their bravery and strength to protect their country. Yet, throughout history, patriot has also taken on negative tones. Consider the anti-government Patriot Movement of the 1980’s and 90’s to see how patriotism can go awry. Today, we who pay attention to the news notice that patriot remains a word with the power to unify or divide.

Etymology of patriot

Patriot comes from the Greek words patriotes, “fellow countryman,” patrios “of one’s fathers,” and patris “fatherland.” It entered English use in the 16th century via the French word patriote, meaning “countryman” or “compatriot.” Shortly thereafter, in the 1600s, political unrest characterized Western Europe as Protestants and Catholics battled for power. Often, the adjective “good” was used before patriot to clarify when someone was on the correct side of a political divide. Whether or not you were a “good patriot” depended on which side you were on and who was judging your worthiness.

History of use

Later, in the 17th century, patriot became a term of ridicule or abuse. It took on the derogatory sense of someone who claims to support his country but actually does not. A patriot was someone who was disloyal, who had partisan desires to upset the established government.

Therefore, it should be no surprise that American colonists and writers of the 18th century welcomed the term patriot to describe the people fighting against the tyranny of the British monarchy. Note, the British rarely referred to the colonists as patriots. Instead, they called them rebels or “the rabble.” After the American Revolution, thanks to the success of the war, patriot returned to its original meaning, with a positive connotation, of a fellow countryman.

Things turned divisive again in the 1850s, when some Americans resented the influx of immigrants into the United States. Patriot appeared in nationalistic hate speech and in the rhetoric of the Know Nothing Party. This political organization and its supporters saw external influences and immigrants as a threat to American values. In that era, a patriot named someone who put America first before all other concerns. This promoted an “us versus them” mentality.

Some semblance of this meaning of patriot persisted into the 20th century. The Patriot Movement of the 1980s and 90s promoted the idea that any person or organization who didn’t embrace America First values was considered a threat. And that threat could include the United States Government. The Patriot Movement spawned a rise in state militias and anti-government rhetoric. Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols supported The Patriot Movement. They were both convicted of involvement in the Oklahoma City Bombing of 1995, the deadliest act of terrorism in American history. And as recently as 2021, the men and women who stormed and vandalized the Capitol in Washington, DC on January 6th, were called patriots by President Donald Trump.

Modern use

In its 2005 revisions, the Oxford English Dictionary included one entry for the definition of patriot that says, “an opponent of presumed intervention by the federal government in affairs of individuals, especially with respect to gun and tax laws. Frequently in the names of libertarian political and militia groups.” When asked about this definition, the editors of the OED said they added the entry based on current use.

In September 2025, on the podcast “The Opinions” from The New York Times, director Ken Burns discussed his upcoming documentary The American Revolution. Among other things, the film grapples with the notion of what a patriot is. According to Burns, a patriot is a “lover of constitutional liberty.” Burns said in the interview that he wants “patriot” to be a word all Americans can find a place in. After learning about the controversial history behind this term, I think that’s a lofty aspiration. But I share the hope that Americans can return to using the word patriot as a positive force for hope and unification.

What are your thoughts on the word patriot? Tell me in the comments.

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!